With the push of a button the abuse ends. The victim is free. A healthy life can begin.
NOPE. NOT EXACTLY.
Before you bust open the champagne, what about the virus? The default program? How many people know about the first 24 to 72hrs of instability.
Ladies and gentlemen, friends and family, before you get excited about the advent of the Aspire App, we must first address the virus. The app is genius. It is a much needed and fantastic tool for both victims and their support team. That said, having been a victim, I have some serious concerns.
I am concerned about the virus, the default program hidden deep within the carrier. The carrier is the victim NOT the Aspire App.
How many of you are aware that after all of the careful planning and success of leaving an abuser, a victim will most likely go back? According to The National Domestic Violence Hotline a victim will leave their abuser seven times before leaving for good. What does this mean for an uninformed general public? Frustration, resentment, discouragement, and indifference can result in what might be perceived as a failed attempt at freeing a victim for a healthier life. Whatever faith a support system had in the Aspire App may be diminished. Again, the problem is not the app.
The problem is the lack of education, support, and local resources. If you are part of a victim’s support team buckle up and be prepared to commit to the long haul. Educate yourself on what you are in for. Is it possible for a victim to leave and stay out of abuse on a first try? Yes. Under our current social conditions and available local resources is probable? No.
I showed a few ex-victims the Dr. Phil clip on the Aspire App. At first they were all enthusiastic. When it got to the part where Dr. Phil talks about being able to access resources available to victims not only did I get a response but, it was the same response. What resources?
Currently the resources that one links to through the Aspire App are national and limited. There is some education for victims as well but the type of education available is difficult for a victim to relate to at that stage of abuse. It is almost more beneficial to the victim’s support system than the victim. This is not the fault of the Aspire App. This is simply where our resources are at. It is difficult to link to resources that don’t exist or are so obscure that ferreting them out takes tenacity.
The first 24 to 72 hours are the most critical and the most dangerous when a victim leaves an abuser. It is essential that they feel safe, make sense of their new freedom, be educated as to why they wound up in domestic violence in the first place, and local resources to start the rehabilitating process. Without an infusion of these elements right away, the probability of a victim going back to her abuser is painfully high.
Victims are not the only ones that need to be educated. Their support system does too. As the victim’s lifeline to a healthy new beginning, the people in the emergency contact list of the Aspire App should be aware that the App does not fix a victims thinking. Once the victim leaves they are still very vulnerable and susceptible to the influence of their abuser. To minimize the odds of a victim returning, start educating before the time of exodus. Sites like 2bSisters and 2btru2you will help educate both the support teams and the victims about what they are up against. They also contain links to national Domestic Violence help sites for further education.
We are in the duration with you.