Anna’s Story – January 2009

January 2009……………..
I asked my in-laws if they might be able to help fill in the gaps taking care of our son so that I could get a part-time job. They agreed. I went back to a previous employer, that upon exiting, told me that if I wanted to come back to let them know. I went back Walgreens, to speak to my previous store manager. He was unable to hire me at the time, but referred me to another store close by that he knew was hiring. I went to that store and spoke with the store manager. Within a couple of weeks I was working part-time. I cared for our son during the day, slept when he slept, dropped him off with his grandparents in the late afternoon, was at work by 4pm, and was off at 10pm.  I don’t know about you, but it’s difficult for me to come home and go straight to bed. I would typically make it to bed about 1am. My husband would pick our son up from his parents when he got home from work. Again, varied hours so our son may have been with his grandparents all the way up until I got off work especially if my husband was on call. Our son would wake up about 6 or 7am. I would only get about 5 hours of sleep before having to get up to take care of him. I cleaned the house, ran errands, and took care of all of our household business as usual while I was up. I did my best put our son down for a nap at noon so that I could get a nap in before work.  In retail, it is almost impossible to get weekends off. Most places will not even hire you if you are not willing to work weekends. One of the conditions of my hire was that I would have at least one day off on the weekend to spend with my family. Which seemed fair right? Wrong. It was fine for a while. But then my husband started in, “We never see you”. I would typically close on Friday nights and open Saturday morning. I hate that. It would just drain me. So by the time I got off work I only wanted to go to bed. I was still exhausted because I could never get enough consecutive hours of sleep. I felt like I never slept. Just took long naps. I would push myself to be awake and spend time with our son and my husband as a family. My husband was an early riser. It take a stick of C-4 to get me out of bed in the morning and then a pot of coffee to get my engine going. But those two would be up and about so I would drag my hinnie out of bed.

This went on for several months as we headed into the fall. I was becoming more and more tired, and all my symptoms were returning. My husband was riding me more and more that the income I was bringing in was not significant, he hardly got to see me,  the house wasn’t as kept up as it usually was, I was behind in taking care of our household business, and I was becoming so run down, and sick I was in bed every chance I got. He also complained sooooo much about hating his job, working long hours, never being home, not having enough money on the weekend to go do things, living in Az rather than back in our home town in Cali, belittled my job, and my role at home as a wife and mother that I researched companies and job opportunities for him back on the Central Coast of Cali. I went as far as to revise his resume for him, draft, and mail out his resume and cover letters, AND! follow-up to schedule telephonic interviews with prospective employers. What an amazing wife. Right? Ha! Funny…..

Knowing that we would both have to work if we made that move, I enrolled in a class online to begin the process of becoming a certified fiduciary in Cali. I had been an executive assistant for a private fiduciary (probate and estate management) for 2 years prior to the birth of our son. A long time family friend was who lived on the coast had retired from her work with the county and was making a move into that industry. It seemed to me that this could work. We would move back to the coast, we would both be happy to be back home, our son would grow up with his cousins, long time family friends, and life would be good. Nice plan, I thought. So I resigned from my job in late September, began cleaning out the house, selling all of our large items, and packing the rest that we didn’t need to live on a day-to-day basis in preparation of the great migration back home.

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