Never again, and I have said this before, will I do summer classes. I have learned a profound truth about myself. I have limits. There, I said it. Ever since I was a wee Aries I have been under the false impression that I am invulnerable. I could do anything I set my mind to. Seriously, I could do…anything.
Well, maybe I can do anything, but I am going to have to pace myself. So many of us mothers believe that to be a super mom we have to be a Super Mom, cape and all. If I wasn’t working my 38hr work week, I was working on my 20+ hrs of homework (that was for one class by-the-way and I was taking two). If I wasn’t doing either of those activities I was engaged in my 6hrs of required appointments for my rehabilitation program. My children clamored and begged for attention.
They would interrupt me every few seconds. “Mommy, look a what I can do!” “Mommy, look what I did!” “Mommy, I am hungry.” “Come watch a movie with us.” “When are you going to be done?” “Are you ever going to be done?” “Are we there yet?”. OK, that last one was for the car…but you get the point.
They were burnt. I was burnt. When my mid-term was due for my Color and Design class I didn’t sleep for a little over 24hrs, worked my full shift, and made all of my appointments. Dear Lord…have mercy. But that didn’t compare to when my final portfolio was due for the same class. I went 48hrs with no sleep, worked two full shifts, and made all of my appointments. I am still recovering from the sleep deprivation and that was a week ago.
“…you start taking on more than you are ready for the game becomes about how much you can take on, instead of how well you handle it…” – George ‘How Do You Know’
The above quote essentially sums up how I handled my summer. My body simply couldn’t keep up with the demands I put on it. As a result; my house wasn’t as clean as I like it, my children had a “relaxed” schedule, dinners were quick, appointments were rushed, my schoolwork didn’t reflect my capability, and I survived off of Extra strength Exederine and coffee. This is not the example I want to set for my children on how to balance their lives.
I want them to learn that being Super is about balance and grace. Learn how to only take on the amount of projects that will allow one to reflect the best of one’s capabilities. In doing this, when life throws one curves, one will be able to handle them with grace. The quieter we are able to be as individuals the more in tune with our personal power we can be. That, in and of itself, is powerful.